What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
