carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize