I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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