My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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