protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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