Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
