Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
