dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
