why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
