What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
