Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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