do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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