nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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