is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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