i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
