I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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