Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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