The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Randomize
