If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
sarcasm needs its own font
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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