what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
