Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
