please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
so let's talk penis.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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