She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
