Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
the liver wants what the liver wants
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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