she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
