I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Randomize
