Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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