A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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