I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
