And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I've blown a few things in my day
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
