It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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