The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
