i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
