You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
