He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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