i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
