That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
