i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Pooping to opera.
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