Christians are straight up FREAKS
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
