i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
