We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
