I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize