I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
