this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'm at about main and main street
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
