He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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