no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Edward fifth and chaser hands
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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