Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
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