do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
