Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
