I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
