you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
