Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Randomize